How To Be "The Real Thing": Honest With Myself

At the heart of being "the real thing" is truth. In order to be "true", the genuine article, authentic, we have to become absolutely honest with ourselves, with others and with God. What does it look like to be absolutely honest? Let’s start by being honest with ourselves.

I admit my weaknesses as well as my strengths. It can be really hard to admit my weaknesses, but if I have a false view of humility I may have an equally difficult time admitting my strengths. Everyone who makes character a priority knows that humility is a quality to be desired. Many times in our efforts to portray ourselves as humble we avoid acknowledging our strengths, deflecting all praise. True humility does not mean that I focus only on my weaknesses and ignore my strengths. True humility means that I accurately appraise both my strengths and weaknesses. To deny my strengths is to deny the One who gave them to me. When I reject any praise for something I really am good at the result is a lack of truth. It’s okay to say “Thanks” and, actually, a more genuine and humble response.

I recognize that I can't do it all. Truth means that I am honest about what I can’t do. This may include a lack of ability or time, a personality ill-fitted to the required task or a family need that requires me to set aside a particular endeavor. I have to honestly evaluate myself and my situation. Determination is a great quality, but when determination causes me to overlook my real limitations, then it causes me to lack honesty. Proverbs 19:2 says “Enthusiasm without knowledge is no good...”

It can be painful to admit that I am honestly ill-equipped to accomplish something that I really want to do. A candid evaluation may help me discern that I am not ready now, but could, with some preparation, be ready in the future. But a truthful assessment may also tell me that my goal needs to be adjusted because what I am shooting for will always be out of my reach.

There are times when I have been limited because of artificial boundaries, but then there are the boundaries that are built into me. If I ignore those, then I ignore the One who built them into me. A favorite verse of mine is Psalm 16:6 “The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places.” Part of being honest is accepting that not every opportunity available is the right opportunity for me. Sometimes I will need a lot of wisdom to discern correctly.

I accept that perfection in this life is not possible. For some reason, perfection was definitely a goal that I used to strive for. But I have learned the difference between a pursuit of perfection and a pursuit of excellence. Honesty demands that I accept the fact that perfection is simply not an attainable goal. There will always be some kind of flaw in me and, therefore a flaw in my efforts. However, excellence is possible.  Excellence means that I put forth my best effort in everything that I do. Recognizing my inability to achieve perfection allows me to be content with my efforts knowing that I have honestly done my best. This allows me to relax and enables my efforts to be more successful.

Take some time to honestly evaluate yourself. Don’t ignore your strengths. Admit your real weaknesses and limitations. Make a plan to work on improving what you can. Learn to shoot for excellence rather than perfection. There is freedom in that. Go for it! It’s within your reach!